Why I hate out-of-towners

So I never stopped to think about why we New Yorkers are perceived to be rude until today:

I was riding the elevator going up from my building's basement with my basket of laundry. The elevator stops at the first floor, door opens, and a group of four upper middle-aged people step in. Three women, one man.

Door closes.

One of the women looks at me - in casual shirt and shorts - and at my basket of laundry, and says, "Columbia University student doing his laundry."

Now, I'm not sure who the comment was directed towards, and I'm really annoyed (it's a dreary day out anyways), so I retort, "Is this some kind of museum tour?"

To which she answers, "Yes, we're visiting a friend of ours who lives in this building."

Elevator keeps going up. Stops at my floor, thank god, and I get out to leave. "Good luck in college," she says. Now i'm really annoyed. "This is actually a grad school dorm," I say, and leave.

Small episode, but it shows the difference between New Yorkers and everyone else. New Yorkers, getting on an elevator, know to get in, look to the front, and shut up. Now, if there's something really noteworthy - a cute dog, a cute girl - you may have permission to invade the other person's space and start a conversation. If it's a cute dog, the person's asking for it. Same w/ cute girls. And maybe, if there's a MASSIVE rainstorm outside and the person getting in looks drenched, you are allowed to express sympathy. This is good New Yorker manners.

BUT, if there's really NOTHING to build a conversation out of, and you're in an elevator for all of 30 seconds, you shut up and just watch the dials.

What you do not do is invade other people's privacy by random observations. What you REALLY do not do is remark about other people in the elevator to the friends you came in with. We new yorkers like conversation. but we like interesting conversation. we like meaningful conversation. we do not like observations about us that state the perfectly obvious just so you don't have to listen to the sound of the elevator gears for a few seconds.

and what we really don't like is to be regarded as museum objects. Do you ever see us going to Omaha and going "Midwestern farmer riding his tractor down main street?" NO. We keep those thoughts to ourselves. Yet you tourists come, and you feel it necessary to put us into some sort observational box. "Oh look, mommy, there's a Columbia University student... with a Barnard girl... oh god, what're they doing with that cucumber ???" Just shut up and let it go. It's new york. it happens.